Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!

[haf1zur]

Greece - 'The oldest known civilisation of paedophiles.'

[DarnPB]

Why did my wife cross the road?

To get back to the first shoe shop we went in three fcuking hours ago.

Why does Lily Allen vote Conservative?

Because she's never been in labour.

Why did my wife cross the road?

To get back to the first shoe shop we went in three fcuking hours ago.

why did the women cross the road?

because they are incapable of driving in a straight line!

why did the woman cross the road

who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

Why are women no good at skiing?

'cos there's no snow between the bedroom and the kitchen....

Mohammed heard one of his wives was leaving him, so he rushed home where he found her on the carpet in front of the tent with her belongings; he sat beside her and said, “I heard you were planning to leave me?”

She replied, “Yes, I heard your other wives saying you were a pedophile!”

Mohammed thinks for a minute or so and then responds, “that's a mighty big word for a 6 year old."

Miss GTI is gonna love you lot!!

[MissGTI]

lol i was having a bad day.

What's slimy cold long and smells like pork?
Kermit the frogs finger 

[VR6_Wherry]

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
Trick question, feminists can't change anything!

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead just bought a car. Which one drives it first?
None, they're all in the kitchen.

Whats does your wife and a condom have in common?
They both spend 99% of their time in your wallet

Why did God make woman last?
He didn't want someone telling him what to do.

What do you call a woman with two brain cells?
Pregnant.


 

[MissGTI]

How is a man like a snowstorm?
Because you don't know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it'll stay.
   

[DarnPB]

I wanted to put an England flag in my garden but wasn't sure if it would offend Muslims. So I wrote "Allah is a twit" on it just to make sure.

[houston]

all this bad mouthing women, 90% of them have the smart genes inside of them!







the other 10% spat it out!

[moutains]

whats the definition of a womans legs they go from her feet to har arse trying to make a cnut out of each other

[BanburyCo]

What is the definition of Confidence?


When your wife catches you in bed with another woman & you slap her on
the Ass & say, "You're next!"



What 3 words do you dread most while making love?


"Honey, I'm home."

[The Mighty Elvi]

What 3 words do you dread most while making love?


"Honey, I'm home."

"Son, I'm pregnant."

Sickened for you.