Isn't it ironic: Jade Goody's head looks like an egg, and it'll be in a box this Easter.
Jade Goody has stated that she is "ready to go to heaven".
Looks like cancer isn't going to be the last bad news she hears.
Just seen a hearse with just married on the back.
Jade Goody has been advised by doctors to take plenty of rest, increase her pain relief medication and not to bother buying any green bananas.
I heard that Elton John is going to release a charity record for Jade Goody.
It'll be called "Cancer in the Minge".
Jade Goody's latest therapy includes mud baths.
The doctors admit they will serve no medical purpose whatsoever but will get her used to the smell of freshly dug earth.
The woman who turned up at Jade Goody's bedside with a hammer also had screws, nails, wood and a measuring tape.
She also apologised for being a fortnight or so early.