Brother in law fiancée - not liked by anyone

[bobotheclown]

http://www.stickmanweekly.com/ReadersSubmissions2009/reader4887.htm

The above link mirrors exactly what my in-laws are experiencing at the moment. My brother in law has asked his girlfriend of 6 years to marry him however no one in the family likes her. She is from Thailand and she doesn't try to integrate with the family. He and his fiancée are living at his parents house and she doesn't talk to his parents or contributes to the house in any way. She leaves half drunk drinks around the place and doesn't even offer to make cups of tea for the in laws.

In other words she is bloody lazy and anti social. His mother asked her if she will look after him when they get married and she said "I don't think I can". When asked about the ring she "expects a bigger one for the wedding" and recently she said "in my country women aren't expected to do any work and the husband is there to look after the wife"

[gazareth]

not your problem man. let it go.

[mike1990]

Yes, has said not your problem. I sympathize with you, she needs to give them more respect. However, if you intervene and tell her her wrong doings then the whole thing can blow up in your face. Leave well alone mate.

[The Mighty Elvi]

[Guy]

i think its down to the parents to say something... obviously they can't say who he can and cannot marry, but they can say who they have living in their house. if someone was staying with me and not pulling their weight I would say something.

perhaps when they eventually live together (hopefully before he gets married) your brother in law will realise that he's making a mistake, either that or he doesn't care as she is very good at ping-pong 

[bobotheclown]

Love the ping pong comment. I totally agree that it's not my problem but I can see the in laws getting stressed and at their age it's not good for their health. The wife is very concerned about their health.

[Thom89]

If she's a gold digger, have words with her, to let them know, that you know what's going on... then walk away
If things are not OK now, they certainly wont be in the future, and the welfare of the  In laws are the priority!
We had a very similar situation few years back, that in retrospect, had their been discussion, it would have solved many problems. The family is now totally divided on my wife's side, with zero chance of any reconciliation, we've had to start again from scratch!

Thom

[Egbutt Wash]

In this sort of situation a little kindness can go along way.  Try to like her and involve her in family things.  She might cheer up and start to muck in.

[Len]

Tell your B-in-Law that he can do a lot better than her.
She will soon tire of him if he cant keep buying her presents and clothes etc.

[clipperjay]

Just sounds like every other couple in Britain today! 
Family is everything right?
Blood is thicker than water right?