Author Topic: Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!  (Read 140816 times)

Offline Ant1981

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Re: Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!
« Reply #1170 on: 06 December 2011, 17:56 »
I just overheard a guy stacking shelves at Tesco complaining because the top shelf was broken, and he couldn't keep it up.

I think he had a wrecked aisle dysfunction.
80% of your posts are total tripe, as they are mostly replies to sh1te posts created by the morons that, unfortunately this forum attracts.

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Offline Jay

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Re: Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!
« Reply #1171 on: 07 December 2011, 13:53 »

Passat B5.5 2.3 V5 170, with all the extras.

Want some online storage? Click here to sign up for a Dropbox account.

But for the purest engine experience, displacement has no replacement. All other methods are simply attempts to artificially recreate the benefits of displacement.

Offline Sam

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Re: Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!
« Reply #1172 on: 08 December 2011, 02:13 »
I rarely laugh at jokes like these but thought this was a good en

The other day, I saw the headline: 'Woman beats off rapist' and I thought... "That seems like a reasonable compromise."


The entire world is a Money Pit, you just have to pick yours.

Offline Jay

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Re: Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!
« Reply #1173 on: 08 December 2011, 18:34 »
Elephant: "Why do you have boobs on your back?" - Camel: "Thats a stupid question coming from someone who has a pen!s on his face."
« Last Edit: 08 December 2011, 18:54 by Jay »
Passat B5.5 2.3 V5 170, with all the extras.

Want some online storage? Click here to sign up for a Dropbox account.

But for the purest engine experience, displacement has no replacement. All other methods are simply attempts to artificially recreate the benefits of displacement.

Offline jfscooby86

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Re: Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!
« Reply #1174 on: 08 December 2011, 18:39 »
love the thead lol  :grin: :grin: :grin: :grin:

Offline whiter_than_white

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Re: Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!
« Reply #1175 on: 08 December 2011, 21:42 »
The Jeremy Kyle 12 days of Christmas:12 cans of Carling, 11 DNA tests, 10 dads to choose from, 9 teeth between them, 8 squeezed in tracksuits, 7 stinking smackrats, 6 Dunlop trainers, 5 stolen rings, 4 fat slags, 3 ugly twits, 2 timing barstewards and a w*nker who parades them on t.v !!!!

Offline The Mighty Elvi

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Re: Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!
« Reply #1176 on: 08 December 2011, 21:44 »
I'm waiting for Guy to post up his joke.

 :lipsrsealed:


Offline dubber36

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Another bad joke
« Reply #1177 on: 15 December 2011, 10:09 »
As a trucker stops for a red light on the A4 a blonde catches up.  She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck and knocks on the door.  The trucker lowers the window and she says "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load!"
 
 
The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street.  When the truck stops for another red light the girl catches up again.  She jumps out of her car runs up and knocks on the door.  Again, the trucker lowers the window.
 
As if they've never spoken, the blonde says brightly "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"
 
Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street.  At the third red light, the same thing happens again.
 
All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door.  The trucker lowers the window.  Again she says "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"
 
When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to the next light.  When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck and runs back to the blonde.  He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says............

"Hi, my name is Kevin, it's winter and I'm driving the bloody gritter."

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Re: Another bad joke
« Reply #1178 on: 15 December 2011, 10:14 »
bad joke, but makes perfect sense..lol :grin:

Offline asif

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Re: Jokes section - **May Offend** try not to spam too much!!
« Reply #1179 on: 15 December 2011, 11:17 »
I took the train home last night and was staring at this beautiful young girl sat opposite. She said "what are you looking at", I replied "six to eight years depending on how hard you struggle!"
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