Well i gave up trying to fix it, and took it to my local VW dealer for a diagnostic check.
They worked on it for a day, and eventually told me that it wasnt the sensor as the computer showed, but in fact a fault on the ABS ECU, it wasnt reading from the sensor, price to repair £600

But after all the work they did tracing the problem, they didnt charge a penny

So i now have to source an ABS ECU.
I tried BBA-reman, £130 to fix mine, gonna look for a secondhand one first i think.
it goes on .................
does anybody know if the ABS ECU is the same one on any other models, or is it specific to the VR6?