
Brilliant thread. Not got round to reading all of it yet so this may have already been covered.
A mate of mine who is a bit like Ballotelli i.e. "Why always me??!!" once brought a bird home. He decided to give her a right good tonging on the sofa before taking her to bed to finish her off.
Another mate and me awoke in the morning to find a large red stain on the sofa that hadn't been there before!
The best part is that she very clearly made no attempt to advise my obliging friend that it was the "wrong" time of the month!!!
