Scientists working for a underground organisation, thought to be funded by Yahoo, Ask.com and MSN amongst other search engines, have found a how to control a type of gravity that effects computer pixels. They appear to have dug a secret facility directly under Google's UK data centres and built the codenamed "RAGGD" - Ridiculous Anti-Google's Gravity Entertainment Device in order to bring down the search giant.
A Google UK spokesperson has said "This device is bringing down the usually high quality search results users of the company's search engine are used too, we hope to bring the service backup up to normal as soon as possible. We're not sure who exactly is behind this, but a pirate hacker group called nicknamed GOD - also known as 'Google Orrr Doomed' - are taking responsibility for this at this time."
http://www.google.co.uk