GolfGTIforum.co.uk
General => Detailing => Topic started by: JDM82 on 28 July 2011, 21:32
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My neighbour has just purchased a brand new series 6 convertable. She paid £67,000 and its the dogs nuts! She washed it for the first time the other day and I couldn't help but notice the cheap CARPLAN shampoo she was using as well as the jumbo sponge and only ONE BUCKET!!!!!!!!!!!!
I watched til I could take it no more and I went out and tried to educate her on how to clean a car the correct way.
I got a blank look and a "Its only a car" comment :angry:
As I walked away shaking my head in disgust I noticed her rubbing the hell out of a load of dried bird poo............... I went in the house and screamed into a pillow :grin:
Some people dont deserve top of the range cars, I know its her car and her money etc but...........................
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Should take that sponge and slap some sense into her :laugh: :laugh:
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It stings people in the arse when they come to sell the car with shocking paintwork..
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Also she came in today and shes proper curbed the driver side alloys, either that or Freddie Kruger has changed a tyre for her :undecided:
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It's a woman. What did you expect? a Guy?
:nerd:
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Next time I see her Im gunna take her keys off........ Slap her hand and say NO! ..... NO!
And if that fooking sponge comes back out well...................... Its definately a kick in the fanny for her :evil:
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The world just isn't fair!
But how flipping thick is she, spending nearly 70k on a motor and then not taking proper care of it! You would of thought she'd do some research or at least pick up the yellow pagers for a local valet service!!
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Next time I see her Im gunna take her keys off........ Slap her hand and say NO! ..... NO!
And if that fooking sponge comes back out well...................... Its definately a kick in the fanny for her :evil:
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: tickles me! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
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best thing to do is not let it get to you
about 10 years ago this was how everyone washed their cars and if you used Auto Glym SRP you were the daddy
Guy across road from me uses a broom and a big nasty old paint bucket thing to wash his car, it sounds like sandpaper
:grin:
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offer to wash it for her, if she can afford a £70k car then she can afford to slip you a few brown beer tokens for a quick wash and wax done properly, just tell her of the money you are saving her in depreciation for not swirling the feck out of before its a year old!
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I did offer her to wash it when I had all my products out to wash mine and her response was " I don't want all that sh!t on my car" :shocked:
The sh!t she was refairing to was the likes of, lime prime, chemical guys sealant etc. Not quality products from CARPLAN :rolleyes:
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well you'll have to get up in the middle of the night and do it under the street lights whilst she's asleep :grin: do it every night then it will never be dirty and she will never feel the need to do it herself! :grin:
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Yeah I can imagine the phone call to the police at 3 o'clock in the morning.......
(Neighbour) "Hello is that the police?"
(Officer) "Yes this is the police, whats the emergency?"
(Neighbour) "There's someone in my car, I can see him out of my bedroom window"
(Officer) "Whats he doing?, stealing your car?!"
(Neighbour) "NO, he seems to be treating the leather with some sort of conditioner!"
(Officer) "I beg your pardon, miss"
(Neighbour) "Thats not the worst part officer, its not even a CARPLAN leather conditioner!"
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Yeah I can imagine the phone call to the police at 3 o'clock in the morning.......
(Neighbour) "Hello is that the police?"
(Officer) "Yes this is the police, whats the emergency?"
(Neighbour) "There's someone in my car, I can see him out of my bedroom window"
(Officer) "Whats he doing?, stealing your car?!"
(Neighbour) "NO, he seems to be treating the leather with some sort of conditioner!"
(Officer) "I beg your pardon, miss"
(Neighbour) "Thats not the worst part officer, its not even a CARPLAN leather conditioner!"
:grin: :grin: :grin: :grin:
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:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Is this woman fit?? :huh:
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Id say she's a milf yeah :rolleyes:
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Id say she's a milf yeah :rolleyes:
Pics :lipsrsealed:
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Now thats a hard one :grin:
(Me) "Excuse me, destroyer of paint, but can I have a picture of you?"
(Neighbour) "What for???"
(Me) "Well Im calling you worse than sh!te on this forum and Ive told them your worth a slap and tickle and they wanna see whats what"
(Neighbour) "Hello is that the police again? Its the lady who rang last night about the guy conditioning my seats, well he's now asking for pictures of me"
:grin:
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:grin: :grin: :grin: :grin: :grin: :grin:
So what are you waiting for? :tongue: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
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pics or post code! :smiley:
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pics or post code! :smiley:
Yeah ill give her post code out..............
Within a couple of hours there's 30+ VDubs parked up outside................. All the owners with a bottle of lime prime, a microfibre cloth and a boner! :grin:
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maybe she misunderstood you when you asked to buff her bonnet :smug:
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:laugh: :laugh: My new favourite thread! :laugh: :laugh:
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Hey my neighbour asked for some advice today about cleaning her car :smiley:
Im making progress :wink:
Although her question was.......... " Do I have to wash the car before I apply T-CUT?" :sick:
I don't recall what happened next, it all went black and I've just got released from the local police station. I've come home and there's blood all over the drive :grin:
Only joking but that was her genuine question :shocked:
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Might sticky this thread so you can post regular updates :grin: :grin:
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....CARPLAN shampoo she was using as well as the jumbo sponge and only ONE BUCKET!!!!!!!!!!!!
I watched til I could take it no more and I went out and tried to educate her on how to clean a car the correct way.
Wow.
I got a blank look and a "Its only a car" comment :angry:
She's right.
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Her cars probably just a rental, she pays XXX amount for a month and goes back after 3 years. She won't 'own' it and will not care. Its transport and and an image thing for her. I have them round here like that, they simply don't care.
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The best thread i've read in ages! About as bad as my step dad who insists on using ASDA's wash and wax as "It's all the same, just comes in a different bottle" :rolleyes:
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This thread is pure brilliance :grin:
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whilst reading this, certainly had me havin a giggle!
look forward to regular updates lol
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Man with approaches attractive neighbour who is washing a car with ample soap suds...
'Excuse me miss, can I give you a hand with that?' (taking sponge dripping with suds)...
Sound of guitar with wah wah pedal ... baam ba ba baam baam ba ba baam ba...
:grin: :grin: :grin:
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The best thread i've read in ages! About as bad as my step dad who insists on using ASDA's wash and wax as "It's all the same, just comes in a different bottle" :rolleyes:
He's right.
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Also she came in today and shes proper curbed the driver side alloys, either that or Freddie Kruger has changed a tyre for her :undecided:
Ha ha freddy krueger :)
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....CARPLAN shampoo she was using as well as the jumbo sponge and only ONE BUCKET!!!!!!!!!!!!
I watched til I could take it no more and I went out and tried to educate her on how to clean a car the correct way.
Wow.
I got a blank look and a "Its only a car" comment :angry:
She's right.
If thats how you really feel then my friend, your in the wrong section :undecided:
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Also she came in today and shes proper curbed the driver side alloys, either that or Freddie Kruger has changed a tyre for her :undecided:
My box is the same. He had a brand new Jaguar XKRS and within a month he had curbed alloys and yesterday i noticed very light scratches down one side, probably from brushing against hedges down the lanes to where we both live. Sticky old coffee stain on passengers seat?
Then goes mad at me when SOMEONE ELSE slightly scuffed my company car.