Yeah keyless is hit and miss.. Particularly locking.
Start stop, yes white is off.
Lane assist, turn it off. Press the end of the left stalk, click OK on the steering wheel. Has to be done each time you start unless you use obd11 to make it remember.
The primary and secondary users let's it save different settings. Eg heating settings, radio stations and other things.
Software upgrade, they will only do that if you report a fault that the vw system suggests an upgrade is the fix. 1668 is marginally better but not the magic complete fix vw promise...